Methodology and Privacy
This page describes the data sources, privacy architecture, and analytical methods behind our research series. Every claim in the series traces back to the methods described here.
What Is BeMoreKinky?
BeMoreKinky is a mobile app for couples to explore, communicate, and negotiate BDSM and kink activities together. Couples express preferences on hundreds of specific activities, propose play sessions, assign power-exchange tasks, and take personality profiles. With over 25,000 monthly active users, it is the largest dedicated BDSM communication platform for couples.
What We Analyzed
This research draws on aggregate patterns from October 2024 through February 2026, covering:
- ~11,000 couples with active partner connections (25,000+ users)
- ~2,000 unique activities rated by users as "yes," "no," or "maybe"
- 34 personality tests and 22 quizzes completed by users
- Play proposals sent between partners, with acceptance/decline/expiry outcomes
- AI-generated scenes created from user-selected activities
- Task assignments in the power-exchange task system
Key Definitions
| Term | Definition |
|---|---|
| Acceptance rate | Percentage of users who rated an activity "yes" out of all who rated it |
| Mutual yes | Both partners in a couple independently rated the complementary activity pair as "yes" (e.g., one rated "Blindfold them" yes, the other rated "Be blindfolded" yes) |
| Conflict | One partner rated "yes" while the other rated "no" on a complementary activity pair |
| Concordance | The percentage of activity pairs where both partners gave the same response (yes-yes, no-no, or maybe-maybe) |
| Experience level | Self-reported on a 1-4 scale during onboarding |
Who This Reflects
This is a portrait of a self-selected community: people who downloaded a BDSM-focused app and chose to engage with its features.
Important limitations:
- Not representative. This data reflects preferences within a BDSM app community, not the general population.
- Demographic fields were optional. Gender has a ~59% null rate. We do not draw gendered conclusions from this data except where explicitly noted.
- Stated preferences, not behavior. Ratings reflect what people say they want, not necessarily what happens. Proposal and scene data gets closer to action, but still within an app context.
- Self-selection bias. People who download a kink app and actively rate hundreds of activities are not typical. They are likely more communicative, more exploratory, and more comfortable with kink than the average person.
Privacy Architecture
Given the intimate nature of this data, we want to be completely transparent about what this report is, and what it isn't.
We have no access to your personal information. BeMoreKinky is built on a privacy-by-design architecture:
- No names or email addresses appear in this analysis, or anywhere we can access. Email addresses are irreversibly hashed (SHA-256) before being stored for analytics. We literally cannot reverse them. Names are not stored in any analytics system.
- All chat messages are end-to-end encrypted using XSalsa20-Poly1305. Your private encryption keys never leave your device. Our servers relay messages but cannot read them. Chat data was excluded from this report entirely.
- Task and journal content is encrypted at rest with AES-256, using keys derived from your account. We cannot read your task descriptions or journal entries.
- This analysis looked only at anonymous patterns: whether one anonymous ID rated an activity as "yes," "no," or "maybe," and whether that ID's partner ID rated the complementary activity the same way. At no point could we connect any preference to a real person.
Analytical Methods
Activity ratings
Acceptance rates are calculated as yes_count / total_responses per activity, filtered by role type (dom/sub) where relevant. Sample sizes (n) are reported for key claims.
Concordance
Partner concordance is calculated by matching dom-perspective activities with their linked sub-perspective counterparts. For example, "Blindfold them" (dom) is paired with "Be blindfolded" (sub). Both partners must have rated their respective activity for the pair to be included.
Experience analysis
Users are grouped by self-reported experience level (1-4). Acceptance rates are calculated within each group. Change is reported as the absolute difference between Level 1 and Level 4.
Conflict rates
Conflict is measured at both the category level (aggregated across all activity pairs in a category) and the individual activity-pair level. Directional conflict (dom-wants-sub-doesn't vs. sub-wants-dom-doesn't) is reported where relevant.
Contact
For questions about methodology or data access for academic research purposes, contact the BeMoreKinky team.
Return to the research series overview.